While on my journey with NLP and my personal healings, I touched on few sensitive points that was not aware to me earlier.
I lived all my life from being different to my parents and them not accepting me for my preferences and choices in life. My people and my family plainly termed my choices as wrong because my parents were against it. In most societies parents are supposed to be the perfect example for their children and they are declared to never to be making any wrong decisions for their children.
Although I went on and lived my life, not precariously though, but as a career woman, wife, mother, a friend, etc. I was still looked down upon by my family because I broke the herd bond and did things that a righteous good girl would never do. This reason for being separated from your roots weighed heavily on me from the time I can remember. I was lucky I found like- minded people who were true to themselves and moved forward in my life.
Though subtle it was very evident that in the community we are not supposed to have personal choices, even simple things like the style of the dress u wear, its color, food u eat etc. In our community we are judged for everything that is on the outside as well as on the inside. So we all had to keep our pretensions on to just not to be picked on. This makes us too scared and afraid to move away from the line drawn by certain sectors of the society and we bend and become a photocopy of others.
This restriction played its game on me too. I did things to help me move on in life but kept hating myself as I felt that I am going against my parents, due to the sheer attachment to them. It was not intentional that each one of us is born different. There are over 100 billion people in the world and even the twins are not similar.
So this struggle to remain similar to be accepted takes a toll on each one of us. And I saw that 90 % of my clients were suffering trying to stick to this dogmatic view of life and surprisingly one of the reasons for many of their illnesses like migraine, anxiety attacks, auto immune disease, sciatica, plantar fasciitis, allergies, long term pain that doesn’t seem to leave in spite of various medications etc.
I recognized this part of me that hated myself during my healing process and then the transformation was phenomenal. I understood my parents were too struggling to be accepted by the herd and they just could not handle me being any different.
I miss my days and years I could have spent loving them. If only my parents knew that it was okay to be the way I am and being different is normal, many situations and pain could have been avoided. I realized that a helping hand to such parents and children who are struggling will lit up their lives and each one could find their dreams being fulfilled. More love can be shared and received. Life gets better automatically.
I love working with different kinds of struggles with people, but my strive is always to reach as many parents as possible and help them connect more deeper with their children. I wish I had someone when I was a child who accepted me as me or my parents were informed better.
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